Tuesday, September 18, 2012

A Hypomanic Post

It is early in the morning, or late at night depending on how you look at it. I probably shouldn’t be posting right now, but I’ve shared everything else about my disorder, so here’s a post written and posted while I’m hypomanic.

I don’t want to go to sleep. My mind is racing – I have so many ideas right now. One, which I thought was brilliant, was to build a marble race to take a marble down two flights of stairs along the wall. It includes an elevator, rails painstakingly made from wire, and chutes and drops made from cardboard. (Please note the painstakingly made rails in the photo).

It is really, really hard to get everything to work. It’s like debugging software – you fix one thing, and another goes wrong. (Sort of like the psychiatrists working on my brain).

 I’ve stopped working on tonight’s project because I just hit my cat with a marble, and he is super mad at me.

I hope the kids will think it’s a fun toy in the morning, and not something crazy. I’m sure there will be a joke about me losing my marbles at breakfast.

If I was talking to you right now, I would be talking very fast. I would be jumping from one idea to the SQUIRREL! (If you got that reference, then you have good taste in animated film).

I feel like I’ve learned a lot tonight – mostly about building marble races. It might come in handy one day, like if our youngest joins Boy Scouts and they have a badge for it.

I’m thinking that I need to put padding on the wall where our cat jumps and bangs his head.

I’m thinking that I could build a bridge from our patio to the pine tree, and make a platform.

I’m thinking about what will happen to the internet, and my phone, when a really, really big solar storm hits. I am also thinking about what steps could be taken to protect our electronics. Should I dig a big hole and bury my computer? What will people do without phones?

I’m thinking why doesn’t the government have emergency cell phone towers on helium balloons, so in case of earthquake we would have phone service?

I’m thinking why don’t we do that anyways? Why have towers on tops of buildings when you could get more range from balloons?

See what I mean? Racing thoughts, oversharing, acting grandiose, planning irrational and huge projects are all symptoms of hypomania. Right now I am totally overconfident.

Being like this feels good, and that’s bad, because it’s hard on my body.

Hitting the cat with the marble made me stop, and come to my senses somewhat.

I will try to get some sleep if I can leave that damn marble race alone. It’s so close to working!

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