Thursday, September 6, 2012

Why I'm Eating Lots of Bread Tonight

I received some horrible news an hour ago. One of my son's friends, whom I have known since she was a young child, was killed in an accident. This is compounded by the death of a friend just a few days ago from cancer. And my son moved into his own place the other day - a healthy thing, but another loss for me. Finally, my wife, who has been seriously ill for the last year, became suddenly worse, and has had to leave for treatment. She will be gone for a week, maybe two.

I am working overtime to keep on top of my thoughts. It is alright to feel sad - anybody would - so I let myself feel that emotion. It's important for me to recognize the difference between that and being depressed. Sadness over so much loss is normal. It's the stress of it that aggravates my depression.

So, my body tells me to eat lots of carbs. Craving carbs is normal when you feel very sad or very happy - and there's a good reason.

Researchers have discovered that carbohydrates create and regulate serotonin in the brain. Without carbohydrates, you start to feel cranky and emotionally wonky - so your brain makes you crave carbs. You can't make that craving go away.

I know that while things will never be the same again, with time everything will be alright. But I made a lot of bread tonight because my brain told me to. And while I'm eating it I'll be thinking of my two friends and their families; my wife who has suffered so much; and my son - who I raised as a single parent for many years - leaving home.


brie said...

Huge, bread-filled hugs to you D'Arcy. xo

D'Arcy said...

Thanks, Brie...big dough hugs to you, too. XO

Unknown said...

My prayers are with you and your lady through this difficult time.

Also: Bread is tasty. Enjoy it. Enjoy your carbs. Have some hot chocolate. I find that helps too. Or maybe that's just me.

D'Arcy said...

Thanks, Jenn. I love the hot chocolate idea - I will try that tonight.